thats the GLORY of love..

You've got to give a little take a little
and let your poor heart break a little
That's the story of that's the glory of love

You've got to laugh a little cry a little
before the clouds roll by a little
That's the story of that's the glory of love

As long as there's the two of us we've got the world and all its charms
And when the world is through with us we've got each other's arms
You've got to win a little lose a little
and always have the blues a little
That's the story of that's the glory of love

(As long as there's the two of us we've got the world and all its charms)
And when the world is through with us we've got each other's arms
You've got to win a little lose a little
and always have the blues a little
That's the story of that's the glory of love
That's the story of that's the glory of love


All I remember of my last day with him was that I was really happy, then crazy me tried to push the boundaries and I paid a hefty price. Now I have to let this beautiful partner walk away and it hurts like crazy. I'm doing my best to deal with it, I talk to people, I distract myself.. I don't think I have slept well in weeks. I know my body could last this battering maybe for another month.. I know.. I need to bury my heart and throw away the key. Now that he has left, all the questions that I had about our relationship has been so strangely answered. He was the normal one and I was the screw up. And it sucks that I didnt appreciate what he provided for me. I've had to learn it the hard way and I will not get the opportunity to make ammense. Andrew I am sorry for all the bitterness that I put you through, though it was never my intent. Somewhere in the last months we swapped roles in this relationship and now I totally feel how you must have felt. All I can say is sorry. I will keep loving you, just like I promised.. maybe one day it will morph into a form that you and I can both comprehend.. I'm wondering what you are up to now.. doing my best not to call.. good nite and good bye baby boy..

Someday

Someday
When we are wiser
When the world's older
When we have learned
I pray
Someday we may yet live
To live and let live
Someday
Life will be fairer
Need will be rarer
And greed will not pay
God speed
This bright millennium
On its way
Let it come
Someday

Someday
Our fight will be won then
We'll stand in the sun then
That bright afternoon
'Till then
On days when the sun is gone
We'll hang on
If we wish upon the moon

There are some days dark and bitter
Seems we haven't got a prayer
But a prayer for something better
Is the one thing we all share

Someday
When we are wiser
When the whole world is older
When we have learned
I pray
Someday we may yet live
To live and let live
One day, someday
Someday
Life will be fairer
Need will be rarer
Greed will not pay
God speed
This bright millennium
Let it come
If we wish upon the moon
One day
Someday
Soon

One day
Someday
Soon

In all the despair and desperate moment, I still feel promise and want. I am looking forward to the new opportunities that I am making for myself. I can't wait for it all to be realised. Yet the anticipation of the unknown leaves me wanting more. I can't believe 3 years has gone by because working the last 3 days takes me back to the beginning.

Job found!

hey there!

Its really quite shocking.. but I found a job..
From Wednesday I'll be working for a PR consultancy firm
The afternoon since the interview has been such a whirlwind..

I look foward to the opportunity of a new beginning..
can't wait..

well.. i hit the clubs again yesterday,
and after hearing how justina and shing describe my drunken state
i think that my drunken state was under declared
i am so totally not looking forward to seeing the photos that they took.

aside from that I am happy to say that i only had
less than a handful of sips of alcohol yesterday
i had so much fun dancing

i think i enjoyed it far better sober than drunk

i now figure that part of the whole enjoyment of dancing is the attention you get
performing.. thats what its called..
to dance and get a reaction from people is satisfying
whether it just looks, stares or ppl who just want to dance along..

i drove everyone home after..
then at 4.30 got busted by my mom while I was washing up...
I told her I was coming home at 2 from Raffles marina..

oh raffles Marina shall be another post..
hopefully i'll be able to load the pictures

goodbye to you - michelle branch

Of all the things I believe in
I just want to get it over with
tears from behind my eyes
but I do not cry
Counting the days that past me by

I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
Looks like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend and I say

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I love
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

I still get lost in your eyes
And it seems like I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes till you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light but it's not right

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

Ohhh yeah
It hurts to want everything & nothing at the same time
I want whats yours and I want whats mine
I want you but I'm not giving in this time

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to

We the stars fall and I lie awake
Your my shooting star


thats exactly it.. i could not have said it better.. zouk was really fun today.. it certainly looks a lot different without the booze.. but hell I had more fun this time.. except for that stupid waesel that I manage to pinch in retaliation..

yup I've been posting a lot lately..
I have traced it to my compulsive need
to share with people what is happening in my life
now that I don't have someone that I can call
this is my new outlet..

I hope that I can keep this up
waiting till the end of the day to
tell the www that my day went more than okay

ahh.. the sweet smell of chocolate cake..

after 2 batches of chocolate cakes..
my whole house smells of the stuff...

yum!!

not that its a bad thing..
nope you cant have any its for the dance welcome tea..
so much chocolate cake
makes me smile with pleasure
I dont take much pleasure in eating chocolate
but much people do

it makes me happy and thats what is important
I worked hard to make it..
I hope this evening turns out well
I'll go back to sniffing my chocolate..
*smile*



Gosh the new school year has started without me..
I gtg i'm already late as it is..
ciaoz!

life is wonderful... Jason Maraz

It takes a crane to build a crane
It takes two floors to make a story
It takes an egg to make a hen
It takes a hen to make an egg
There is no end to what I'm saying

It takes a thought to make a word
And it takes some words to make an action
And it takes some work to make it work
It takes some good to make it hurt
It takes some bad for satisfaction

It takes a night to make it dawn
And it takes a day to make you yawn brother
And it takes some old to make you young
It takes some cold to know the sun
It takes the one to have the other

And it takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
And it takes some fears to make you trust
It takes some tears to make it rust
It takes the dust to HAVE it polished

It takes some silence to make sound
And it takes a loss before you found it
And it takes a road to go nowhere
It takes a toll to make you care
It takes a hole to MAKE a mountain

Ah la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la life is meaningful
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la life is meaningful
Ah la la la la la la life is full of
Ah la la la la la life is so full of love
Ah la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is meaningful
Ah la la la la la life is full of
Ah la la la la la life is so full of love

the worst cab ride.. the worst train ride.. all self inflicted..

its all in a days work... or can I say play..

so its like this..
we had a couple of drinks me and Shing before we hit the club
objective of the night was to get wasted..
O bar was a tonne offun cos Junstina was there with her friend..
and we hit it off like last time
Tequila pops all round!
in the first half hour that I was there
I swear we were plastered to the bar
haha.. so we're all giddy like school girls taking photos n stuff
and on impluse we (what in my mind felt like staggering)
piled into a cab and went to zouk
zouk is a real blurr to me..
I remember entering the club, but not getting out of the cab
gg to the toilet and then loss the bunch of them..
I only managed to catch a sillouette of nicole though I was just feet away from her
in all this time ariel and anhong were there at the club
but had I walked my them.. lets just say that I was too pissed drunk to notice
my head was heavy, I felt like throwing up..
but I guess in that moment I felt on the outside what I was needing to feel on the inside..
I allowed myself to feel that.. i went from giddy giggles to boom wasted
and god that was just what I needed..
I danced at phuture.. I dont recall any music.. just dancing and many warm bodies
and that somebody stroked my head.. which was kinda odd.. it being a club..
anyhow it didnt feel like we stayed long
we headed out.. into a cab
on the worst cab ride of my life
Shing and I didnt say a word.. she didnt have to..
I knew exactly how she felt
we were in and out of consciousness
every grove in the road I felt in my gut
if I went over another hump I would have hurled in this poorman's cab..
we sat on the patio steps relieved to be home
I remember lying back on the floor arms ourstretched
apparently we passed out..
I woke up this morning all cosy in my bed
dont remember how I got there..
but most happy to be back..

we woke at 10..
but didnt get to cartel until 12
gosh my taste palate are so screwed up today
lunch was awful the roast chicken was bad.. I barely touched it
anyway I headed for the filming for the video shoot at my chiropractor's office at lido
all this time feeling quesy and bloated with air..
praying that i won't hurl when they switch the vibration chair on.
the filming for primetime morning went on without a hitch
after which it was time to head on home
after borders I took the train from orchard
and gosh, I felt just like I did on my cab ride
I was to squat and be close to the floor
the crowd just make me want to puke

each station when by at such a snail pace
god my head started to hurt
I want to ask what was wrong with me
but decided against it.. the msg is still in my draft folder
but I managed it home
and for the second time in a day I passed out
this time on my TV room couch
with Alias as my lullaby

so apart from that I think all that binge drinking has killed my taste buds
lunch was bad I barely touched the chicken it was dry and there were just to many things going on on the plate
dinner I had hot plate.. but seeing that my parents draggedme out of my passed outness to eat Iate like 5 slices of beef n a mouthful of noodles.. supper was probably my best meal of the day.. but for some reason everything I ate tasted of alcohol.. of course I didnt admit that to ariel. The tao huay tasted powdery and borderlining fermented.. n i could have sworn that I tasted tequila in the chiken wings.. but I know that thats just one Crazy thought..

yup yup..
well as for the no.of drink that I had.. who's counting..

serendipity

you both were meant to be...

both of you might have almost met a year ago, I doubt either of you remember...
participant in the Arts Bash pagent.. one of the rare occasions that you accompanied my friends and I to the club...
I believe it was MOS.. you both might have cross paths there..
he say you on the stage, she saw you through the crowd
longing gazes..
stolen glances..
bumping into each other as you walk to the bar for beer
not knowing.. none the wiser
a year goes by and there it is
almost meeting..
finally meeting.. met


i think its kinda romantic...

NUS-Dance Reflections! Support the arts!!

Dance practice was gruelling.. as usual.. only this time lao shi kept scolding me for being slow.. yup i must agree I was slow by abeat, but man that did not feel good. So what to do suck it up keep practicing the spins and poses until my head was spinning. The only emotion I had nailed was anger and yet all that anger clouded my ability to remember the steps.

Calling all you from NUS..

support NUS combined dance group perfromance

for the up coming Dance Reflections...

i'll post more soon..

calm after the storm

angst always gives me inspiration to post.. thank got I am pursuing a career that does thrive on inspiration.

yesterday was the disasater,
and today for the first time I glimpse at the aftermath
dawn, the sun peeked out from behind the dark clouds
it illuminated the sky, for as far as the eye can see is utter devastation
from beneath the rubble, do I hear.. muffled moans
shards glisten in the sunlight
the land smells of burnt flesh
all I see is devastation

then I hear walls cave in from the far side,
from down the old street
and from under my feet
I see a hand, a man, life!
another hand, a man, Life!
with him a smile
and through yesterday's ordeal
there is still reason to smile
because I lived to tell this tale

happy thoughts

think happy thoughts I said to her
of sushine and flowers in bloom
think of all the amazing possibilities
a day spent looking out over the water
at your favourite place in the whole wide world

its funny that I always went there when I'm really sad

it needs to all feel better
i wish everything was all put back together

happy thoughts will get me through
smile to hide my sorrow
all the things I love I want to hate
all the things feel like it'll never be right

I wish they were all put back together

wish happy thoughts on others
say happy words to me
hope happy dreams will soon come true
gosh they seem so far from me

laugh happy truth, because I finally understand
hold happy memories because that really all you have
have happy love, because I had never wished that upon myself
I will wish that from now on, maybe one day not now
it will all come shining through

slowly..

it started with a smile
lasted with longing
regret hung in the humid air
tenderness in the night rain

like a cliche
it lasted to long
and ended too soon

with every meal is a shared memory
every spoonful closer to the end
the walk away is the hardest
bringing back feelings that hurt

in every walk a destination
one I am no longer in control

it makes me happy, it makes me sad
it makes me feel whole, lets my fear dissipate
it lets me feel, it leaves me possibilities
it lets me live like everything is okay

it leaves me wanting, it leaves me empty
it makes me realise how much I depend
it feels so good, it feels so true
I want it just the way it is

there is no beginning.. there'll be no end

I always thought
that everything starts
that everything ends
in between its all to be written
that in between the tears
there are smiles and laughter
that true it all it turn out okay

but I've come to find
that it might have finished before
and it might be over
when it comes back together
it is as if everthing was as you left it
it all feels so familiar
everthing flows like it use to

When you're gone - Bryan Adams

I've been wandering around the house all night
wondering what the hell to do
I'm trying to concentrate but all I can think of is you
well the phone don't ring cuz my friends ain't home
I'm tired of being all alone
got the tv on cuz the radio's playing songs that remind me
of you

baby when you're gone I realize I'm in love
the days go on and on and the nights just seem so long
even food don't taste that good - drink ain't doing what it
should
things just feel so wrong - baby when you're gone

I've been driving up and down these streets
trying to find somewhere to go
ya i'm lookin' for a familiar face but there's no one I know

this is torture - this is pain - it feels like I'm gonna go
insane
I hope you're coming back real soon -cuz I don't know what
to do

i finally found something that aptly describeshow everything feels right now, I love this song and this song loves me.

Reunion!

My dear IJ 4s4 girls,

I am planning a class reunion in DECEMBER bearign in mind that some of you will be studying for the exams. My hope is that we all can catch up on old times and CATCH UP on where everyone has been since we have graduated. Maybe comb through old videos and PHOTOS.

I would like some input on what we should do for a reunion.. I believe that the food is secondary to the company. So do let me know if you are interested in the idea and any help will be greatly appreciated.