i'll miss you..

I came home on Monday night from dance practice, and over supper with family, I found out the Rupert was sick...
Thats odd cos, that golden fluff ball is always bounding around.. God I miss him...

So after eating we went to say goodnight.. But he was lying in his own urine, he wouldn't move, you could tell that he was uncomfortable. His breath was shallow... After moving him indoors, cleaning him up, we hesitantly went to bed.

So when I woke up dad N I took him to the vet...

He was really sick he couldnt even walk on his own...

and at 1.30 he passed away...


I came through the driveway, paused.. its so odd that he wasn't there to bark n though I would have hushed him.. I could help but feel a pang in my heart...
Through all the slobber n squeals as he charged at me when he was let loose at home... I loved that mutt...

I miss him...

milk tea for $1.85

I woke up bright and early, a kinda oddity from all the other day that I've had. Thanks for the call this morning... for the dedication, it was kinda sweet..

As the rest of the day unfolded, I'm often reminded that the world can't be dandy and uncomplicated. That each person is connected and lives are interwoven.. That things will probably not turn out the way you intend, because there are other considerations, other people in the mix, others' emotions too.

So I walked home dejected, sad. I couldn't help it. I know I shouldn't let it bother me, that sometimes I expect too much from others.

I feel so torn today. Oh well, tomorrow is a brand new day...

WHY? Must I change?

This week has been filled with confusion, affirmation. Not that it shakes my foundation, but I figure that like me, others struggle with daily ups and down.

But someone asked me today, Why must i change?
I'm stumped!! I dont need to change anything. Off the bat, I can't think of anything major that i want to change.

a little piece of heaven

Bubbly by Colbie Cailiat

I've been awake for a while now
You've got me feelin like a child now
Cause everytime I see your bubbly face
I get the tinglies in a silly place

It starts in my toes
And I crinkle my nose
Wherever it goes I'll always know
That you make me smile
Please stay for a while now
Just take your time
Wherever you go


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A little piece of heaven in the crinkle or his nose
in the wake of morning & the crossing of toes
the smiles between butterfly kisses
in the cool night air, in the sips of coffee

I've got me, a little piece of heaven
clasped and locked in hand

with me a little piece of heaven
my heart skipped a beat
leaves me lost in wonderment
glad he's here with me

Dancing Dancing Dancing...

Don't you just love to groove..!!!
Love lyrical!!!




Will be performaning soon... Please come n support!!
$20 to see me and all my friends in tube tops and leotard dancing crazy lifts and turns and jumps...
Not to be missed!!!

6 Sept University Cultural Centre 8pm

Ask me and I'll give you a 20% discount!!

See you there!

I'm left puzzled

it's how I linger on every word
laugh momentarily
catch myself smiling
wait on each hour
second guess myself
how I sink into solace
snuggle up in bed
ponder my stupidity
long for answers
want it all to make sense
how I cry at my naivete
speak with conviction
sour at response
cave on inquisition

it bothers me
smothers me
delights me
surprises me

For inspiration..

Meet Randy Pausch.

I watched him give his "Last Lecture" 3 months ago on Oprah. The short version of course and had only had the priviledge to watched the full version just now. Boy was it worth its weight in Gold!

His "last lecture"- Achieveing Your Childhood Dreams was a true inspiration to me, persevere and do something I liked and loved with the precious/finate time I have. And to truly live my life on my terms, and that everything would come together as long as gave back what I took away. I want to thank him for allowing me and so many others listen in on his "converstion" with his children, there are so many lessons to be learnt from that hour. And I feel so priviledged to have been shared this wisdom albeit over YouTube.

Hope all of you can spare the time to hear what he has to say, if not for the full hour, then for the 10 mins that he shared his wisdom on Oprah.



If you wish to know his story..
http://www.cmu.edu/homepage/beyond/2008/summer/an-enduring-legacy.shtml

Red Cliff

I walked into the theatre with apprehension, thinking to myself, have I just paid to watch an hour of senseless killing like on Troy and all the other brutal war movies.. Afterall that what war is to me. More so than politics and geographical, cultural misgivings, war is playing with the lives of men. Men who are fathers, sons, brothers to people that care and love them, people that they have to leave behind. It's not so much the fact that they have/had to scarifice to protect they loyalties. But the powerful just wanted to flex their muscle.

Yet as I watched Red Cliff, my appreciation grew for the tatics, the foresight and strategy that goes into waging a war, that success does not come to the most powerful, or the most skilled but the most dedicated and the best prepared. That in all the choas of war, there still can be reminants of order and beauty in the larger scheme of things.

It doesnt mean that I condone sending thousand of people to the frontlines, while the tyrants and strategist decide peoples' fate by pointing and pushing papers from their cushy chairs. I mean how is that any different from assisting in the deaths of all these people under their command?

Coming into my own

It like the cosmos want to tell me to start over
lost much, risked all, left much more behind
somehow it has come together
preparation meeting opportunity
to bloom into something wilder than my imagination
I'm standing on the edge
on the edge of eternity
on the horizon of my lifetime
I'm eager with anticipation
can't wait to dive into it all

I'm standing on the edge
on the edge of eternity
on the horizon of my lifetime
because I have found you