I'm kinda badass~~

I've been over thinking things, wondering what other people think. And when more than one person tells me that. I better start believing that it is true.

I guess that why I keep some of my thoughts private. But I guess this shall be an exercise in letting loose, the lest of self restrain. And to suffer the imaginary consequences and barriers that I perceive there are.

lets go..

POE is this weekend and I can't wait to dive into it. But boy am I nervous.. I do not know why I should be, just that I am. How people will treat me and watch me just because I should know my stuff. I do not want to anticipate. Most of all I want to have a tonne of fun meeting new people and really getting involved in an environment that is all NEW :)

Has it been that long since I've been with someone, Yeah.. And I guess to say the least, people are asking a big WHY.. I don't really have a good answer to give. Other than, I am not rushing it... I met Esther at her chalet reception and she was surprised that I didn't bring a plus one. Ceci at Gary's wedding was asking me if I am seeing anyone. Matthew asked so when is it your turn.. referring to marriage. It shouldn't matter at all.

It does not really bother me. Except I wonder, there has to be something up with me, like a sign that says in big block letters @@CRAZY DON"T DATE@@ or @@She's PSYCHO@@. I see some peeps breezing through boyfriends like the changes in season. I just wonder where do they find all these people.. and why is it that I find it so hard to even find one. oh well.. no hurry.

finally, I did a handwriting analysis on http://www.handwritingwizard.com/ and I got a result that I do not know if it is true. As I was telling Kenneth, it marks me as a loner who feels not with her heart but with her head. One who has difficulty expressing emotions except for a blow up or shut down. It also says that I have a very low.. I mean LOW perception of self.. And I think to some extent I feel that I am like that. On the other hand, it could be me feeling that I lack these things.. again just over thinking the situation.

Verdict? I chucked the report and decided to just be myself. If you do not like it, too bad!!~~