Some people are relegated to averageness...

I know what i'm missing and I don't have the balls to own what is right fully mine.
I think I am crazy.. but I think I'm shy to admit that I have self-esteem.
Somehow admitting it makes me feel like i'm sassy and stuck up.
but funny enough I am always jealous of them.. you know the queen bee types.

Shing and I were watching Wicker Pack yesterday and I saw old Alice as a relection of myself...
i'll see if I can post a picture of her...
she was in a frumpy winter jacket
Her har had grown out of shape...
she was a misfit.. on the outside looking at people and their stupendously perfect lives

I feel, I know just how that feels...

and yet I a part of me wants to embrace that, but everything time I never make it out the door...

I do admit that I have not done anything lately worth mentioning
though I have dreams of grandeur, they are but just dreams...

so this is my advise to myself.. stop wishing... you know what to do..
it has bloody fucking hell got to be done

wip that lazy good for nothing ass into shape..
conquer each hurdle one at the time...
dont get distracted by the mountain ahead..
its the baby steps that matter.. (and again you're right)

i dont believe in this title, and yet I breathe and embody this statment....

I really have to stop wasting my own time...

Its time to dream big, live large, one step at the time...