what was i expecting,
you know I always thell myself that things are going to be different this time
I always hold on to the hope that for once it will turn out differently

but once again i'm dissapointed
for different reasons
at different people
for being the people that they are

I know I'm probably naive
I know that I can choose to hurt
but hurting my own is easier
then leaving it all behind?

i guess its not so much that i've lost
but I've got no bloody guts to let you what I feel
I'm starting to feel frustrated
i think i'll jus stay home today


So today my grandma is over at my house
and because I was suppose to be somewhere at 2
I ate lunch first before they got here
now that they are here and I have no where to go
I've eaten lunch so they didnt leave me a space on the table
and even if they did I wouldnt know what to do
because I feel so sickly full cos I had to stuff my face
if not mom wouldnt be happy that she put in that effort to make lunch especially for me
so now left out of everything
and I hate that feeling

I'm probably making something out of nothing, but thats me
i guess I'm diestined for that life