you think you always know

I painted a perfect image of your reflection, and assumed that what you protrayed was true. The more i inched my way to you the further you withdrew into you shell. I could not understand why you were relegated to the outter rims, the only thing that i felt was certain that you did not fit in. You moulded your face to fit the crowd i'm disappointed. Have you not learnt that you've hurt me. The more you pondered the harder you tried to change the way you look, but i thought you always knew the way to go was to be true. It finally dawned on me that to be true, is to be true you to my friend not to anyone or anything else.

I've been talking to many people, praying during retreat.. listening alot too..n casual conversations.. one thing i realise that that the underlying themes of all those conversations are self-worth and truth..truth of character.. is what you show on the outside what it is on the inside.

i know you would think i know all that already.. but a light bulb just went off in my head... i am overly influenced by what other people think.. i know it might not seem big to you anhong..but thanks for joining the dots for me... just now when you were talking about ear piercings... i realise that i dont want a couple more... but just 1... for the first time i was FULLY aware of what I wanted.. and not what i thought would make me "cool" in absence of a better word.

thanks to fel too on giving me advise to fend on a particularly " difficult" situation.. mom has told me time and time that if it upsets you so much just not bother about it. i think i should huh? its difficault to say not.. especially when its with someone who doesnt take no for an answer.

i shall put my foot down.