control freak

i woke from the wrong side of the bed
a bad dream
reality gone without a trace
the world in colours of
black, reds and brown
swirling into a dizzy blur
lost under my skin
my minds jigsawed
like frankinstein's pet dog
me, violated and disfigured
by your gentle caress
soft against the harsh truth
of your purpose on this wasteland
i comprehend violent gurgles
all i feel, hear, see
is darkness and pain
your pain and mind
bleed your tender touch
you numbed from our body
weep those beady eyes
till they roll out onto the streets
and get crushed on the side of your car
my nails are ingrown
brown and decaying
my powdery skin torn
scared by your jealousy and rage
voice swallowed whole
a black bottomless hole
till the depths of no return
nothing left of limbs but stumps
beautiful perfect little stumps
tattooed into my side are your vicious lies
eating my flesh alive!
as i dig in deep to find only maggots worms
no organs to whole me together
my destruction your one true goal
burnt from drinking your acidic perfection
i'm scared beautiful
etched till my contours glow dark rings
beautiful in your eyes
and only yours
my mascara smeared tears
no sign of my flawlessness